Sugar Doll

Seeing as it is that Averie has bestowed the Sugar Doll Award upon all of us - callling for ten random facts - I am taking that opportunity to blog a little without recipes. Cooking has been running it's own unpredictable course. From Protein Muffins in May to baked cookies and raw mylk in June, to horrible Chicken Muffins (I won't link...probably this is to somebody's taste but not mine) over Mayo Experiment to feeling so bleh in July I've been throwing everything raw overboard, I am currently eating Whatever Works. I want to find a rut, or a groove, again and fill up my freezer, but I am biding my time with the cooking...which has a lot to do with number 10, so here goes, my 10 Facts + plus a short story about growing up.

1) Shortly after I moved away from home I left the dishes in my sink for so long the contents rotted. I only did that once.

2) I doubt that I will ever see the purpose of keeping non-edible plants.

3) On my nineteenth birthday I was far away from everyone I knew, drinking a piña colada out of a pineapple with a girl I just met in Costa Rica.

4) My first ever yoga class was a blast – the second was a huge disappointment. If the second had been my first I would have never done yoga again, now I’m pretty sure I’ll be doing yoga for life.

5) I really miss riding horses. If there's a cowboy, an elf, or a knight in shining armour in the movie, chances are I'm looking at the horse.

6) The first time I rode a motorcycle I fell. Just toppled over with the bike at really slow speed. I don’t think the driving instructor had ever seen that before and I don’t think it’s generally something anyone does.

7) I started blogging because I saw a baked apple cake. It reminded me that if I ever want to indulge in fresh, tasty food again I will have to learn how to cook better*.

8) I love to whistle. When I met the bf – who is very into music – I told him it was going to be a matter of (short) time before he got sick of my whistling and told me to zip it. He said it would never happen and it hasn’t yet.

9) I am not addicted to handbags – with me it’s hydration/running backpacks. I currently have three that are functional and I’m always looking for more.

10) Tomorrow I had an appointment at the hospital - TODAY they went and moved it to the beginning of August - where they hope to find out more about the interesting ways in which my stomach is not digesting food. I am going to be out cold for the very short procedure so nothing grueling.

* I have no idea why this epiphany was prompted by a cake, but I literally remember the place and the cake. I have never been very fond of cakes, so when I found out the only way to stay gut-healthy and sane would be living without gluten for the rest of my life I didn't worry about cakes. When I tried gluten free, store bought cakes and found out they have more features in common with cardboard than cake, I did not despair. But it was never the less when I looked at a beautiful, fresh, baked apple cake in a cafe that I thought about how food is not just energy - food is about being curious, adventurous, experimental, it is about trying new things and flavours, and I am not willingly parting with that for the rest of my life. That was when I realised I have to learn how to cook flavourful, seasonal, spicy, sweet food myself - the reason why that lead to blogging is because I simply cannot do that on my own. I am tired of cooking before I even begin.

I never liked cooking, and growing up I always imagined never really having to cook. I thought I would get by without it, maybe someday find a man who would cook for me and otherwise just figure out how to get the most of meals cooked in less than fifteen minutes and using only one pot, pan or oven dish. Until I was diagnosed a couple of years ago I wasn't really planning on deviating from that plan - changing my mind and diving into cooking has been an easier decision because of one particular rolemodel.

One of my mother’s best friends was also kind of my replacement-grandmom when I was little. My own grandmother lived quite far away, and when I was ill or needed somewhere to be for a couple of hours, my “second” grandmother would sometimes step in. She had this great attic full of old things from her own daughters, she had an aquarium, and she had lots of time. Some of her most distinguishing features for me were always that she was great at sewing things and an amazing cook – she worked in a kitchen and she made me a new costume (a cat, a butterfly, a fairy…) almost every year, exactly to my demands and after what I suspect must have been pretty flimsy directions.

When I was a lot older I got curious and I asked her how she became interested in cooking. “Oh, I never liked cooking” she said, “but then I got married: my husband couldn’t cook and we had three kids, so I learned how to cook”. It turned out she didn’t like to sew, either, she just learned because it saved on money for clothes for three kids while they were small and she and her husband where starting up a business. As she got better at both things of course, she began doing it for her own sake, experimenting with food and sewing for friends. I remember how astonished I was - but I can totally see that happen. Cooking. It's getting better.